House of Hotchkiss

6/14 Sub Drop – KnowmyPlace, boy.

boy experienced his first bout of  sub-drop this past weekend.  It was incredibly bad and had boy known what he was in for, would have taken steps to prevent or minimize it’s effects. Through boy’s research, boy knew he was entering a sub-drop and assumed (stupidly) that knowledge of what was happening would be enough to ameliorate the effects. such was definitely not the case. there is precious little research that has been done on the causes of sub-drop, but boy has found that there is both a mental and a physical cause of sub-drop.

For boy, the symptoms were mental. boy experienced severe depression, a sense of abandonment, doubts as to boy’s ability to serve, etc. All of these, boy believes, were brought on by the physical results of a very intense “play” session with boy’s Owner. First, there was an adrenalin rush followed by the crash, then an endorphin high, followed by the loss of endorphins, and it was all compounded by the fact that boy is diabetic and boy’s sugar levels were all over the scale. Even were boy not diabetic, an intense scene can cause fluctuations in glucose levels which, when combined with adrenalin and endorphin issues can definitely play havoc with the psyche.

boy’s biggest failing during all of this, was the belief that boy could handle it himself.  boy knew that his Owner had plans for the following day, and boy did not wish to impinge on Her weekend nor Her time with sled, boy’s brother-slave. boy knew what was happening, and decided he could handle it himself. That was ok for the beginning stages, but the mental effects kept deepening to the point where boy was no longer able to think rationally and boy therefore continued to deny to himself that he needed help.

the drop began the evening of the scene (Thursday) and deepened somewhat the next day. boy was still functioning fairly well at that point and was able to make considerable progress on the dungeon painting project boy was involved in. Saturday, however, boy’s condition was nearly completely debilitating. boy started imagining the worst possible scenarios involving his relationship with his owner and his place in the House. boy is ashamed to admit these imaginings even to himself. Worse, boy was completely unable at that point to think rationally enough about the situation to call his Owner for help. On Sunday, boy began to feel better and by Monday morning, boy thought he had recovered almost completely. Little did boy know. Later that afternoon, boy was able to go see his Owner. At the sight of Her boy understood he had not recovered at all and would have been taken to his knees even without Her requirement for a proper greeting. On Sunday, via email, boy had told Her what had been going on, and She was ready for boy. She knelt beside boy, hugging boy and boy lost it. boy started crying (not something boy does as a rule) and realized that boy wasn’t nearly as recovered as he had thought he was.  HotchKiss’s soothing words and gentle caresses soon had boy feeling much better, and literally within minutes, boy was feeling so much better he couldn’t help but wonder what had made him think he felt near normal that morning. The difference was night and day.

boy is convinced that had he called his Owner immediately on entering the sub-drop, She could have ameliorated the situation right away and probably done away with the effects completely by Saturday morning.  Lesson learned.

boy, Owned slave of Lady HotchKiss

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